The KASANOVA Kit - Six Accessories That Give Women a Reason To Linger

Sun, 2009-07-12 18:21

First impressions count for everything at a club.  But the lines you throw the cutie at the bar won’t be what she hears first.  Your clothes and actions already spoke to her loud and clear from the other side of the dance floor.  Or, for outfits bright enough to be mistaken for botched versions of construction worker vests, shouted.

If your threads don’t scream “I’m dying for attention” or aren’t so with the times that they echo the “I’m a clone” ensemble you borrowed from your mannequin buddies at Macy’s, then you’ve at least avoided warranting the “Go away” glare from the women you’re looking to approach. 

If you’re like most men in their mid twenties or older, you’ve at least begun to get an idea of what looks appropriate on you and what doesn’t.  But that only puts you on par with the rest of your male peers.  You can use these accessories to say something extra, without looking like you’ll take anything you can get.

 

 

A LIGHTER

A Firestarter’s Code

            A sleek or unique lighter can make for a great conversation piece.  But more importantly, it’s functional.  If a woman needs a light she doesn’t have to get a match from the bar or ask around.  You’re right there.  

Whether you have a classic chrome lighter or a multi-colored number with a textured surface decked out in engravings depends on your outfit for the night.  The dressier you are, the more conservative your piece should be.  The more casual the outfit, the freer you are to add riskier accessories. The consistency will make your look appear more authentic. 

Match a high-low look , suits, linen, and any pants that aren’t jeans, corduroys, or leather (ugh!) with chrome, black, and sometimes bronze.  If you’re rocking jeans, sneakers, and a polyester zip-up jacket you have more freedom to pull out creative pieces. 

 

If It’s More Dressy Than Casual

Skip the excessively fancy designs, large brand names and logos, loud colors, and excessive engravings when dressing up or attending dressier venues.  Any combination of the three can make you appear showy, pretentious, tasteless, attention-seeking, or like you are trying to look as if you have more money than you actually do.  You want your lighter to look practical, as if you actually use it, rather than just use it to show off.    

Opt for one-color lighters in classic and conservative tones like chrome, silver, black, gold, and no-luster bronze.  If you like to show some individuality, be simple about it.  A small signature or engraving on a one-color lighter can do the trick.   

 

 

 Plastic is for Toys, Toys are for Boys

Women may be able to get away with it, because the brighter colors complement the pinks, greens, and reds they commonly wear.  But pulling out a plastic neon lighter at a club can make a man look like he may not be old enough to by a girl a drink or has to cut corners when it comes to spending because his chain-smoking costs him so much.

There are exceptions.  If you’re in a dive bar, somewhere casual enough to get in with a sneakers and t-shirt, a club for teens, or college night at your favorite venue, then a plastic lighter ain’t so juvenile.  If you’re price conscious and don’t want to spend more than what a plastic lighter costs, then opt for non-transparent lighters that aren’t too bright in shade or florescent in color.

  

A CELL PHONE

Call Me Common       

A cell phone is your can-do-all buddy during a night on the town.  It’s convenient, can store plenty digits, and allows you to continue conversation with a woman who invites you to use it, instead of having to fight your way to the bar for a pen.    

            Most people’s phones won’t change with their wardrobes.  It’s too expensive for your average man and inconvenient for the ones that can afford it.  You can change the face of some phones to match your outfit, but the army-fatigue face is best saved for casual nights and younger crowds.

           

Because You Won’t See Shaq In A Mini-Coop

Size matters when it comes to cell phones.  And bigger isn’t necessarily better.  In fact, you generally should avoid any phones bulky enough to show an unsightly bulge from your pants pockets.  PDA phones, bulky Nextel business gadgets, and contraptions that look like throwbacks from the early 1990s should be left at home or in the car.  Thinner phones like The Razor are the easiest to conceal. 

            Jeans, corduroys, and cargo pants worn at more casual clubs have the durability and pocket space to conceal phones that are slightly larger than normal.  It’s very hard to carry a phone and still look stylish when wearing thinner material like linen, unless you have a very thin and lightweight phone.  Even then, it may be best to leave the phone alone altogether.

 

The Write Alternative

If you don’t have a cell phone or don’t like carrying it because it adds extra weight in your pocket, is too expensive to risk being damaged in a crowded club, or because it is just something else to worry about, then consider bringing your own pen.  No nondescript plastic Bics, but nothing fancy enough to look as if it belongs on the desk of a CEO.  Most importantly, make sure the pen you bring with you isn’t prone to leak or separate from its cap.  The last thing you want is a big, black wet spot on your pants. 

             

PRETTY WOMEN

May Envy Bring Your Eve

Men compete for women.  And women compete with other women for those men.  Flirting with attractive female friends in clear view of other women gives females reason to consider what makes you worth all of that attention.  Women might not like the idea of being likened to accessories and bait, but you don’t need to let them know your intentions.        

           

Even Up The Odds 

If you’re going alone with all women to a club you should aim to go with two women who you know are at least somewhat attractive, knockouts if possible.  Take three at the very most.  Go with fewer and you’re forced to cater to that one woman for the whole night.  Go with more and you risk becoming part of a “girls night out,” something no straight man should be subjected to.

            If there are two men, there should be three attractive women.  One extra means there is always one woman who’s going to work to be included in the group so she doesn’t become a fifth wheel. 

Things become tricky when there are three or more men.  You want the number of attractive (stress, attractive) women to slightly exceed the number of men so that the women are competing to stay relevant within the group.  But you don’t want to have so many women that they become comfortable with the idea of going off in a group of their own and leaving the men behind. 

 

Show Self-Control Amongst The Needy

            Try to bring fun and charismatic women.  Don’t be concerned with whether they are calm or wild by nature.  Just make sure they look good enough to turn heads and that their personalities are likely to vibe with the men in the group.  Bonus if they are flirtatious. 

If you go out in groups and your female friends are particularly touchy or flirtatious, try to avoid initiating contact.  Laying back in this type of situation makes you look like you don’t need to press the issue because women are drawn to you.

             

A MONEY CLIP

The Material

            Quality leather is preferable to metal, which can look cheap or become smudged with thumbprints.  And pulling out a shiny clip that looks pricey can attract gold diggers, women looking for free drinks, and the two shifty men in the corner intent on separating you from your bling after the club closes.

 

Fully-Loaded and One in The Chamber

You should never carry large bulks of money in the clip.  It’s a hassle to take out the money and it looks clumsy.  Use it to hold a few large bills.  Smaller bills, including at least one 20 dollar bill, should be kept folded in your pocket and separate from the clip. 

Whether you pull out exactly what you need for that drink or expose a clip of ten crisp hundred-dollar bills will depend on the type of attention you are trying to attract and the atmosphere of the venue.  If you are in a seedier club where you know anything could happen at anytime, best to stick to the smaller bill and keep the clip in your pocket.   If you’re at a flashy club where money talks, have the money to spend, and don’t mind spending it on women, then ball out.

                          

WRISTWEAR

A Must

Whether it’s a watch or a bracelet, always have something on your wrist.  It gives more reason to draw subtle attention to you, gives women something to play with and a reason to touch, and serves as a conversation piece. 

 

Bracelets

            It’s safe to go with classic small braided links when wearing bracelets.  Silver is also more versatile than gold.  Other material works as well. I’m not too fond of the thick leather bracelets that have been popular over the last two year because I consider them a super-trend.  But I have to admit they definitely work for some. 

Because oversize bracelets draw so much attention to themselves, the rest of the outfit must match accordingly or it will look out of place.  The same goes for larger gold, silver, and platinum pieces. 

           

Watches

Watches come in a much larger variety of style than men’s bracelets, so choosing an appropriate all-purpose time piece can be tougher.  It is advisable to own one chrome-colored watch with a blue, white, or black face, since they go with just about anything.  Owning a second watch that compliments your personal style and the colors you favor will give you more choice. 

 

Stay Real

            Whatever you do, do not buy anything that is fake.  Knockoff jewelry, especially copies of flashier pieces, looks cheap and makes you look like you are trying to be something you are not.  It’s better to buy smaller or simpler bracelets that are of the real material they are intended to look like.  Flashy pieces are fine, so long as you can afford to buy the real thing.   

            

A LIST

Your Cheat Sheet for The Night

It’s last call and she still wants to hang, but inhibitions prevent her from ending the night at your place.  Or maybe she’s just still too sober.  Stuffing your face at a 24-hour diner or waiting to see her the following weekend aren’t your only other options.  Take her, and her friends if necessary, to an after hours spot you know well.

 

Do Your Research

This takes some legwork beforehand.  You should make a habit out of visiting after hours spots when you go out.  Find a couple you like and get familiar with the staff.  Learn everything you can about the venue and the people who run it.  When you’re with females who don’t want the party to end but aren’t ready to give in, you should have at least two after spots you can bring them to where everybody knows your name and you’ve given them enough business to get perks.  Making a great night for and her and her friends run even longer will ultimately work in your favor, even if she doesn’t come home with you that night.